Category Archives: Etiquette

Public Restroom Etiquette – Chick Style

If you are a man or if you have a man in your life you know there is an unspoken code of public restroom conduct for men. For example, guys don’t talk to the other guys while in the bathroom; guys don’t look down while using the facilities; and if there are multiple urinals open, guys need to leave one open in between himself and the other guy.

Why don’t women have a similar code?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a public restroom where women are trying to have a conversation with me over the bathroom stall wall while we are both using the facilities.  Or, how about the woman who uses the public restroom as her own personal powder room and hogs the entire sink area so she can brush her teeth, curl her hair and get her make-up perfect for some imaginary photo shoot?

Ladies, it must stop! Public bathrooms are not a place any of us should want to spend lengthy periods of time.  They are stinky, germ-laden places designed as a public convenience to privately dispose of waste.

While I know it has been done before (see the International Center for Bathroom Etiquette site), I am taking the liberty to create a working code of female conduct for public restrooms.   Please feel free to add to it in the comments section as you see fit.

1. If you are in a conversation with another women while entering the bathroom, it must end within 15 seconds of either woman entering a stall.

2. When you exit the stall, wash your hands, dry them and get out.

3. If your cell phone rings while you are in the bathroom, do not answer it. The person on the other end of the phone does not want to talk to you while you are in the restroom and the other women in the restroom don’t want to hear your conversation.

4. Do not gossip in the bathroom. You never know whose feet are under the other stalls, plus conversations carry outside the main bathroom door.

5. If you must reapply your lipstick or brush your hair, step aside and do so after the other ladies have had the chance to wash their hands. Don’t monopolize the communal sink area.

6. If you enter the restroom with your friend, don’t feel that you have to clog up the limited space in the bathroom waiting for her.  She may want privacy and even if she doesn’t, she is a big enough girl to come find you outside when she is finished.

7. If you see, hear or smell something askew in one of the stalls.  Don’t feel the need to comment.  Have some class and only discuss it with the other ladies in the bathroom if it will pose a hazard to them (i.e. an over-flowing toilet).

8. If you must change your clothes in a public restroom, have the courtesy to let other women waiting go ahead of you.  If there is no one waiting before you go in to change, be sure to change your clothes swiftly in case some one gets in line after you’ve entered the stall.

9. Get ready at home.  Do not use public restrooms as your private bathroom. 

10. Keep idle chatter to a minimum.  It is fine to compliment the woman at the sink next to you on her dress, but leave it at that.  Strike up the lengthier conversation after you have both left the bathroom.

I’ll never claim to be Miss Manners, but, like men, women need to have some public restroom guidelines.

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Filed under Beauty, Etiquette, General, Health, Resources, Thoughts

Why We Are No Longer Friends On Facebook

Why We Are No Longer Friends On Facebook.

This is an entertaining and very relavant post from Kyle Flaherty on Dance with Strangers

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http://stevelindsley.typepad.com/thoughtsandmusings/2009/02/facebook-friends.html

Source: Steve Lindsley

Dear My Former Facebook Friend or FBF,

Privacy is important, or at least it should be, but unfortunately most people ignore their role in this tale. On the other end of the spectrum we have an organization like Facebook that has decided that privacy is the least of their problems and they are going to exploit an inherent weakness in people: Online Privacy Ignorance.

Full story here.

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Filed under Business, Community, Etiquette, Facebook, WebWorld

Four Types of Potluckers

My friends Kim and Tati, who deem themselves serious potluckers like me, sent this article.  It is hilarious and so true.  Enjoy!

PotluckHow to Throw a Successful and Unique Office Potluck
Add a few twists to the standard office potluck lunch or dinner and see the participation grow!

For anyone who has been tasked with having to organize a company potluck, you know that good participation is key. The more organization and planning you do upfront, the better turnout you’ll have. In my company, we have found throughout the years that we have potluck participants from four categories:

  1. The “Chef”
  2. The “Sure I’ll Sign Up”
  3. The “Potluck?! Today!?!”
  4. The “Potluck? Where?”

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Source: Associated Content from Yahoo!

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Filed under Activities, Cooking, Entertainment, Etiquette, Holidays, Resources

People Do Care About What You Ate for Lunch

Years back, before the social media revolution was in full force, I accidentally fell upon an interesting experiment.  I was a relatively new cycling instructor and didn’t know my students on a first-name-basis like I do now.  In between drills, I mentioned that I ate a piece of chocolate cake before coming to class.  And guess what happened … after class I had more students come up and talk to me than ever before.

Intrigued by this concept, I would sprinkle in food-related topics or other surfacy information about my life while teaching and my student feedback during and after class doubled.

Fast-forward to the social media era, where skeptics over-use and abuse the expression “I don’t care what my friend ate for lunch,” as their primary reason for not jumping into the social media mix.  I’m here to call out a resounding BS.

In fact, prior to dreaming up this post, Saturday morning I wrote this in my Facebook status:

“Mmmmmm … Nothing says breakfast like leftover German chocolate cake.”

Seven comments, one phone call and three “likes” later, I’m here to tell you that people do care.

Whether a brand or a person representing his or her own brand, people want to connect with other people.  They appreciate people who talk to them, not at them; and who share tidbits about their lives making them real.

Social media is a fantastic way to exchange professional information, share tips, deals and tricks, and also to network.  But in “real life,” aren’t you more prone to give your business to the person that tells you about his or her children, summer vacation or latest bargain buy as he or she sells you the product or provides the service?

The same goes for social media.  Balance is key.  Like food, don’t over-indulge sharing every explicit detail of your personal life, but lob out information here and there that people can relate to, sit back and enjoy the ride.

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Filed under Business, Etiquette, Facebook, Resources, Thoughts, WebWorld

A Sprinkle

This has been a weekend of old friends.

My second oldest friend Molly, aka “The Beast,” was in town visiting from Northern California.  We only get to see her about once per year, so we wanted to get together with her.  Molly is pregnant with her second daughter.  Since it is her second, she didn’t want a full-fledged baby shower, so instead I hosted her, what Christine calls, a “sprinkle.”

Mama Beast

Being not totally girly, I can usually leave or take traditional baby showers, so this sprinkle may have turned into my favorite of all female traditions.   Six ladies and four kids came over, including Molly and her first daughter, on Friday night.  We sat outside chatted, ate dinner and cake and just hung out.  Rather than the ooohs and aaaahs that come along with each individual gift opening, we traded that for a folded up print out  of a car seat that we all chipped in for inside a card.   And that was it.  Three hours later, every one went home and I got to hang out with Molly for some one-on-one time.

Sprinkles are a great way to celebrate your friend’s exciting life steps in a less formal way.

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Filed under Activities, Etiquette, Tradition

No: The Nicest Word You Could Ever Say

I’m convinced that chronic non-RSVPers have never actually planned an event before.  If so, they’d understand the value of a yes or a no.

In an e-vite era, poor RSVP skills have never been so exposed.  At the core, I think all people are good at heart … even non-RSVPers.  These good people sometimes opt not to RSVP because they don’t want to be rude or hurt feelings by saying “no.”

I’m here to tell you, in the world of a required response, “no” is the kindest thing you could ever say.  It saves the host from over-buying or cooking food, renting extra chairs/tables, paying for a bigger location, ordering extra tickets, etc. 

There is not a required excuse or explanation  tacked to your “no.”  We’re all busy people and can’t be expected to make it to everything.

If you are one of those who likes to keep their options open, then how about a “maybe?”  At least the host knows there is a possibility. 

Next time you consider not responding, ask yourself what is more offensive.  Saying no or causing someone to spend extra money and time prepping for you when you have no intention of showing up?

The answer is simple.

Lord knows I’m no Miss Manners, but not responding is just one of those things that drives this (type) A crazy.

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Filed under Etiquette

Potluck Etiquette: Advice Needed

Where are the Midwest housewives when you need them?

I have long pondered the proper potluck etiquette as it pertains to couples or families.  Something tells me these ladies would have the answer to my questions.

Based on my understanding, when going to a potluck, everyone brings a dish to share.  However, many-a-time couples or families bring one collective dish.  Is that acceptable? 

I ask with the caveat that I’ve never been to a potluck that had a shortage of food.  But is it fair to those who come solo with a dish for those that come with sig other/kids in tow to only bring one dish as well?  At first blush, I say no.

Shouldn’t the people who come in pairs be responsible for bringing one dish that is twice the size – or two small dishes? 

I’m not here spouting judgement or advice because I don’t know the answer. It just seems fair to me that you should bring one dish per person – not group – when potlucking. 

What are your thoughts?  Please discuss.

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Disclaimer: this has ZERO to do with any one who came to my house yesterday.  If anything, people brought three and four items per person … the amount of food was insane, awesome and delicious.

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Filed under Cooking, Etiquette